MJ: I beyond miss you and the kids. I can’t call, but I can text if you can text with me.
Malia: We miss you to Daddy! I can text with you. I have lots to tell you. But before I do, are you okay at whatever undisclosed location you are at that you couldn’t tell me you were going to?
MJ: Cool. Yes. I would tell you if I could. Tell me all you want to tell me.
Malia: My OBGYN “Doctor Cutyoshit” as you call her, appointment went well. Little Isabella in my belly is happy and healthy!
MJ: Outstanding! Can’t wait to meet her. I promise to be the best daddy possible.
Malia: I know you will. And I had a dream last night about what you are working on while you are at the undisclosed location working. You called it a Fuckapersonupulator.
MJ: Your dream was kind of accurate.
Malia: We watched the new Little Mermaid movie. It made me think of you. The movie is a BWWM romance. The little mermaid’s prince charming was a white boy. They fell in love, and you know me. I love love and movies about love. Thank you for being this little black girl’s dreamy white boy love of my life.
MJ: I wish I was there with y’all. Thank you for being my MerMalia.
Malia: And Tesla’s robot (Terminator) attacked an engineer. Guess what that made me think of? Yep! You are creating actual freakin Terminators, but you call them FORCE bots- https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-12869629/Tesla-robot-ATTACKS-engineer-companys-Texas-factory-violent-malfunction-leaving-trail-blood-forcing-workers-hit-emergency-shutdown-button.html
Malia: I did a rewrite of the preamble of the US Constitution to make a sexy preamble version for you/us. See…….
We the Johnson’s, in Order to form a more perfect union, establish sexual satisfaction, ensure domestic love, provide for the common orgasm, promote the general happiness, and secure the blessings of marital bliss to our relationship, do ordain and establish this sexual constitution.
MJ: God Bless Sexy Business America!
Malia: Did it feel weird sleeping alone last night?
MJ: I didn’t sleep alone. Marcus and I had to share a connected bed.
Malia: Do I have to worry about you leaving me for Marcus? I had no idea you and Marcus were like that.
MJ: We’re not.
Malia: Your mom and I went through old photo albums. You were such a cute little karate man.
Malia: And a cute model that became a sexy man……
Malia: I took a shower and felt fat and ugly. Pregnancy emotions are crazy and all over the place.
MJ: Your emotions are fucking liars! You’re a stone cold milf pregnant or not.
Malia: Thanks! Needed that! You have me convinced that you hung the stars baby.
Malia: And I hate it when you travel. I know you have to do it, but I am still allowed to hate it. When you are not here, I can’t sleep. You would think with all the peace and quiet I would get some restful sleep, but nope. I can’t sleep unless you are in bed with me. I can’t sleep unless you are holding me. I can’t sleep unless I hear you snoring at night. I can’t sleep unless you are constantly moving. I can’t sleep unless I am in a sleeper hold or figure 4 leg lock. I can’t sleep unless I can hear your heartbeat. I can’t sleep unless our entire family is piled up on top of us. I can’t sleep and I hate it. I need you to sleep or I will die.
MJ: I couldn’t sleep with Marcus much last night either. He’s not you. I promise maximum snuggle and sleep time when I get back home.
Malia: And this is what you need to know about all other women on earth of dating age besides me.
MJ: Are they all evil witches except you?
Malia: That is the understatement of the year! They are pure evil jezebel spirit having, nasty pill popping, ran through std having, backstabbing, selfish, road whore skeezer bitches!
MJ: All of them?
Malia: All of them! It’s sad but true.
MJ: Well, I guess it’s a good thing I have an awesome wife that doesn’t have any of those issues.
Malia: It is! She loves you more than anything in the whole wide world!
MJ: He/me loves you more than anything in the world! It sounds like we have a great life. Do you want to keep living our great life, and be happy, and raise our family together, and love on each other, and build a legacy, and travel, and support good causes, and other forever love type of things like that?
Malia: I do Michael David Johnson!
MJ: I need to run sweetheart. I miss you. I enjoyed texting with you.
Malia: You have my heart forever! Come home soon so I can sleep! I love you and bye baby.
20 Even More Morer Reasons I Love You Michael David Johnson – https://www.therealmjtheterrible.com/20-even-more-morer-reasons-i-love-you-michael-david-johnson/