MJ: I just talked to my mom. Thank you for helping her lenes.
Malia: I don’t understand. The “lenes”?
MJ: Yeah, every lady in her church group’s name ends in lene. Carlene, Jolene, Ilene, Sharlene, Paulene. There are probably more lenes than that.
Malia: OMG! All of their names do end in lene besides your mom and one other lady. You have an interesting way of looking at things babe.
MJ: What are you doing right now?
Malia: Why, are you going to come make a move on me or something?
MJ: What makes you think that?
Malia: I was watching you out the window. I could see you comb your hair and look to see if you had anything in your teeth.
MJ: Stalker!
Malia: Yeah. Are you going to make a move on me “Stimulated! Stimulated! Oh baby!”?
MJ: Listen here woman! When you started giving me a bj, you told me to tell you when I was gonna blow, because you were feeling morning sickness sick, and you thought you would throw up if I went in your mouth. You told me to warn you, so I did. “Stimulated! Stimulated! Oh baby!”, is what came out.
Malia: Well, something else came out too.
MJ: Yes it did, and fast, and a lot.
Malia: Are you going to make a move on me Mr. Johnson?
MJ: I was thinking about it.
Malia: Am I your afternoon break?
MJ: More like my afternoon snack.
Malia: Meeeeeooooww!!
MJ: So, a little sexercise workout? Yeah?
Malia: Can I tell you something baby?
MJ: Sure.
Malia: If you left me I would stalk you like a crazy person.
MJ: If you left me I would stalk you like a crazy person too.
Malia: Would you really stalk me?
MJ: Yes! Does it make you happy that I would stalk you if you left me?
Malia: Yeah, it kinda does. I would want you to miss me so much that you stalked me.
MJ: We sound like 2 crazy people right now.
Malia: I don’t care. I would die if you left me. I’m serious.
MJ: Me too. Our family is everything to me.
Malia: You promise you would stalk me if we broke up?
MJ: You are just the right amount of f@&ked up in the head for me my love.
Malia: I am?
MJ: Definitely!
Malia: Would you spy on me too?
MJ: It would look like a CIA stakeout on Bin Laden’s compound!
MJ: Would you keep it classy if you were stalking me?
Malia: Not at all. I would be a total psycho creeper looking in your windows.
MJ: Why do I feel like I would end up being tied up in your basement?
Malia: I promise I would only keep you tied up in my basement until you came to your senses and wanted to be with me again.
Malia: You are obsessed with me and I am obsessed with you. I’m okay with that. Hey, we are going to run out of sexy time soon. Michael David Johnson…..Carpe Maliadiem!
“That’s The Last Thing On My Mind!” – https://www.therealmjtheterrible.com/thats-the-last-thing-on-my-mind/
