Question: My name is Malia, and I have a question for “MJ The Terrible”. I heard you and Team Digital Death, had an office built for you on a college campus, right across the street from your south Austin apartment.
I was at the office unveiling this afternoon with my twin newborn babies, watching girls line up to flirt with you.
What are you going to do when all of those young slutty girls constantly throw themselves at you, while your loving wife is at home, only thinking about you and raising your children?
Answer: Aww, baby! I love you! You know it wasn’t my choice for them to build/put the office there. They only put the office there so the guys wouldn’t keep traipsing in and out of our apartments. They have been working on the office for months, and yesterday was the first time I actually saw it.
Please don’t be upset about it. I love you and you alone. If you want, Team DD can use the office, and I will only go over there when I have to, like if one of the directors is coming into town or something. When we need to meet, the guys can come over and meet me at +1 and I’s apartment.
I know you trust me baby. I trust you to, but I get it. I acted the same way during your last photoshoot when the guy was moving your boobs around, to fit into that outfit.
You are my whole world, and an army of “young slutty girls” could throw themselves at me, and I wouldn’t care, because they aren’t you!
Malia: But you are so stupid when it comes to girls. You think they are being nice, so you are nice back. Then, before you know it they are offering you sex. I saw it at the bell pool. Do you promise you love me?
MJ: I would die for you. I love you more than I love anything but our 3 kids.
Malia: You said our 3 kids. Are you going to let me be close with CJ now? I want that. Lord knows Gotye is lacking in the mom department.
MJ: I’m warming up to it.
Malia: I saw she changed her name back. I am the only Mrs. Johnson now. She was only renting the name, but she broke the terms of the lease. I had no choice. I was forced to repossess it.
MJ: I love you. I’ll be up in 30 or so.
Malia: Don’t freak out. I put the silk sheets on the bed. The last time these sheets were on the bed, you slipped and fell off the bed. Remember?
MJ: Yep!
Malia: Olga couldn’t come over to clean this week and breastfeeding sucks all of the energy out of you. Literally!
MJ: Baby, it’s all good. No worries. You have multiple babies and multiple apartments, and me, and a lot of other things to keep up with as well.
Malia: I couldn’t live without you.
MJ: Ditto, and I wouldn’t be alive without you.
Malia: Hurry up. For some reason your snoring helps me and the babies sleep better.
MJ: I’m done working for the night babe. See you in 5.
Malia: K
