MJ: Did your mom come pick up the kids yet? Malia: Yes. I’m excited to go to the game. Hook’em Horns! MJ: Baby, my balls are the same color as the ocean. I want to skip the game and bang the shit out if you! Malia: Are you just saying that? I know how much you like the Longhorns. MJ:…
Tag: Malia and Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson
Trick or Treat Naughty Style
Trick or Treat Naughty Style: Malia: I was so embarrassed last night. I can’t believe Alexa sent Emma and I’s private convo to you. MJ: Baby! It’s all good. What is a “deep orgasm” anyway? Malia: It’s the good kind. Do you talk about our sex life with the guys? MJ: Sometimes. Malia: What do you say? MJ: Good things.…
Yes Girls Do Talk About Sex
Malia: Thank you Alexa for messing up my wife’s voice commands, and accidentally sending me this make me feel awesome message, that was intended for her friend Emma- “He is the first and only man I have been with that gives me deep orgasms. I have only been with 2 other men besides MJ. I enjoyed sex with them, but…
Texas Longhorn’s Inspired Foreplay
Malia: How is it going? MJ: Good. How is the home front? How is Cash? Does he still have a temperature? Malia: We’re good. Cash is back to normal. He is smiling and laughing. I think he misses his daddy. MJ: His daddy misses him too! Malia: Mommy misses daddy. MJ: Oh yeah? Malia: Oh yeah! Since you are working…
Second Marriage Advice From Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson
Guest user 1: My name is Malcolm. I am a fan of Masters of Money and “MJ The Terrible”. Please don’t share my full name. This is a request for advice from “MJ The Terrible”. I was married once before. My first wife and I got married because we thought it was what we were supposed to do. It was…
“Strategic Sex”
Malia: Save a horse. Ride an MJ? MJ: I gotta be out the door in 10 minutes. Malia: Perfect! MJ: Is this “strategic sex” as you call it? Because you want your smell and stuff on me because I will see my ex tonight? Malia: Its weird because I’m not jealous of her, and I know you would never cheat…
It’s Funny How Couple Friends Seem To Coordinate Having Babies
Malia: How are you already up and working? You didn’t sleep. Ugh! If you were up here right now. I’m in the mood. MJ: Well you’re in luck! Because I’m in bathroom. Oh, and I’m in the mother fuckin mood as well. Malia: Wait. What? Why did you say mother fuckin mood? MJ: No reason at all. It was just…
What Baby Making Heat Looks Like In Text 3
Malia: When do you sleep? MJ: I slept right next to you and our babies last night. Malia: We slept. I think they call what you did power napping. MJ: Baby, I don’t want to argue again today, and I’m in an aggressive, kick ass mood! I’ve got to get shit done before I head south to go meet with…
What Baby Making Heat Looks Like In Text 2
Malia: Baby, I need a tool that I can’t find in the tool box. MJ: I don’t even know where the tool box is. Can Mr. Pete help you until I finish working on something? Malia: This tool isn’t in the tool box, and Mr Pete’s tool isn’t the one I need! MJ: What kind of tool do you need?…
What Baby Making Heat Looks Like In Text
Malia: See the girl in this picture with you? MJ: Yes. She’s very pretty. Malia: Well shes ovulating. Do you know what that means? MJ: Ovulating- The discharging of ova or ovules from the ovary. Malia: And do you know what that means for you Mr. Johnson? MJ: I think I have a pretty good idea, but why don’t you…









