MJ: Quick question. Do we have any dinner dates lined up in the next couple of weeks?
Malia: No. Not that I can think of.
MJ: Are you sure?
Malia: Yep
MJ: Have you made any new friends recently?
Malia: Nope.
MJ: Do you promise you haven’t made any new friends recently, and we don’t have any dinner plans in the next couple of weeks?
Malia: I promise.
MJ: Are you sure?
Malia: Yes baby. I’m sure.
MJ:
Google Review and Dinner Invitation
Received: Monday, April 5, 2021 9:11 PM
From: KD HARRIS (TSCA)
To: Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson (TSCA)
MJ,
I wanted to let you know I wrote a positive Google Review for your business.
Thank you for the dinner invitation. Doug and I are looking forward to it. Malia and I think you two will hit it off the same way we have.
It is not necessary to address me as Madame Vice President, or my husband as Second Gentlemen. Think of us as you would any other couple you would have over for dinner.
Ms. White, head of your security detail, I believe has already been in touch with the Secret Service to coordinate security.
Friendly regards,
Doug & Kamala
Malia: I am so sorry! I did not know she sent you an email. If they accepted our dinner invitation, I was going to tell you about it. I always plan our social stuff anyway. Please don’t be upset about this. Kamala called the house trying to reach you, and we ended up talking for like an hour. Are you upset about this?
MJ: I am not upset about you making a new friend. I am not upset about you inviting your new friend and her husband over for dinner. I do feel like you lied to me though. I asked you point blank if you made any new friends recently, and you said no. I asked you if we had any dinner dates lined up in the next couple of weeks, and you said no. It’s not like you cheated on me, but we talk about everything, or at least I thought we did. This just threw me off. Even Brittany knew about it.
Malia: You know how much I like her. I guess I looked at it as a possible dinner with someone I look up to at first. We are becoming friends though. And baby, I do plan our social calendar for the most part. I would have told you as soon as I found out they accepted. It’s on the refrigerator calendar as a possible. It says “Possible dinner date with the 2nd family.
MJ: I didn’t see that, but I think I would have thought you meant like my Asian Mom, or Marcus and Kristi, etc., if I saw 2nd family. I don’t think I would have thought “The 2nd Family” of the United States.
Malia: I wasn’t trying to lie to you. We just had 2 different understandings of the situation.
Malia: I hope this isn’t too soon, but I forgot to tell you that Vice President Harris called for you about 2 weeks ago.
MJ: No shit. What did she want? I noticed y’all are on a first name basis already.
Malia: She wanted to personally invite us to go out to dinner with her and her husband. And we did become quick friends. We have a lot in common.
Malia: Can I tell you something?
MJ: Sure
Malia: I am a stay at home wife and mom. I don’t get out and meet as many people as you do. Most of our friends are friends you have made. It made me feel kind of special to have a friend to invite over for dinner.
MJ: Thank you for telling me that. I get it now. I don’t want you to feel trapped, like you can’t go be more sociable if you want to.
Malia: Baby, I don’t feel trapped at all. I am very happy being a stay at home wife and mom. I don’t want to change a thing.
MJ: Good. Me either. If you ever do want to change something, or you aren’t happy, please tell me ok?
Malia: I will, but I am living my dream life. I mean it. I have everything I have ever wanted and more.
MJ: Me too! You and the kids are my whole world. I forgot to tell you something too. Sorry.
Malia: Is it that we got the house next door?
MJ: Yes! Baby! How did you know?
Malia: I found out on the same day as the Vice President Harris phone call. I was so excited about the Vice President Harris call I didn’t think about us getting the other house.
MJ: Well damn. I don’t have any news to share. I take that back. I talked to our accountant. Our taxes are done. Our income tax bracket is 37%! Can you believe that? Did you know tax rates got that high because I didn’t? When your buddy Kamala, aka Vice President Harris comes to eat with us, I am going to ask her if she can do something about that.
Malia: President Biden actually wants to increase the top tax bracket. Baby don’t be mad at me for saying this, but we don’t pay 37%. We only pay 37% on what is left over, after all of the tax shelter deductions, business write offs, etc. Here is the don’t get mad at me part. I agree with them. I think we should pay a little more in taxes. It’s hard for us to complain, baby. We have 7, and now 8 houses. We own 2 buildings, probably 25 cars and SUVs. My purse collection is worth more than the house you grew up in, and probably more than that. We have so much baby. Can you kind of see why you might not want to ask VP Harris to lower our taxes?
MJ: Yeah. What are we going to do with the house we bought next door? When can we go check it out? I would like to see the inside of the house.
Malia: I forgot to tell you about that too. I did a quick walk through. I have a whole list of stuff to tell you about when we have time to talk.
MJ: These are important things. We need to talk about this stuff.
Malia: Well, if you took your dick out of me for more than 15 minutes, we would have time to talk more. MJ: Do you want me to do that?
Malia: No. I feel connected to you when you are inside me.
MJ: On second thought, I think our priorities are straight. I would rather spend my time inside of you, then I would on this other stuff.
Malia: Yeah! We do need to talk about schools soon.
MJ: My mom brought us that article about how Bethesda has some of the best schools in the country.
Malia: To get your kids into the best schools is not easy. Parents are buying cars for school admissions officials to get their kids into schools. Look at the lady who was on the Full House tv show. She went to jail getting her kid into a school.
MJ: Yep. Jesse Katsopolis wife.
Malia: Uncle Jesse’s wife was in the slammer! Her name is Lori Loughlin.
MJ: It all went downhill after Full House, when her and Uncle Jesse broke up. She turned to a life of crime.
Malia: I love you. I know you know Full House wasn’t real, but I like how you distort things to be playful.
MJ: I like how you like how I distort things to be playful.
Malia: Well, I future like how we are going to go next door and have sex in the house next door when you get home.
MJ: I future like that too.
Ashhole Change Memories & Peace – https://www.therealmjtheterrible.com/ashhole-change-memories-peace/
