One of the first times Malia and I fooled around, I stopped what I was doing, looked up at her, and said- “Baby, your business smells like Cheetos”. She immediately said- “What? Get off me!”, and her legs closed up faster than fast. Then she stood up and backed away from the couch maybe 5 feet or so. She got…
Yes, it is true Masters of Money and “MJ The Terrible” & Team Digital Death are merging with the largest company in our collective industries. More details will be forthcoming in the days and weeks ahead. One quick note to all clients, partners, vendors, friends, followers, etc. We are not changing any past deals or arrangements. Deals made will be…
I showed MJ this kiss collage picture, and he said- “Thank you for kissing me nice.” The bottom picture was taken in 2012 when MJ was dealing with all of the Stuxnet computer virus fallout. The top picture was taken in 2017. I love to see you smile baby. I love it when I am the reason you are smiling.…
Meet the newest edition to our family, and the cutest little creature imaginable…….. Caroline Grace Johnson! Sweet Caroline decided to enter the world a couple of months early. I was telling Caroline that right now there is social distancing going on because of the Corona virus, but for her, social distancing from all boys/guys will continue forever. (Or at least…
MJ was just released from the hospital! I told him I was going to kiss all of his bruises to make them feel better. He has a lot of bruises! It could take awhile. Ouch baby! I still feel so guilty about not locking the upstairs baby gate door. I asked MJ if he would forgive me. He said “We…
I feel like the worst wife and mother in the world!! Our son Cash can crawl now so we installed upstairs and downstairs baby gates to prevent him from falling down the stairs. This afternoon I walked up the stairs and I thought I closed the gate behind me. It turns out I didn’t push the gate hard enough for…
I asked Malia if she wanted to fool around this morning and she said- “I can’t right now. I’m practicing social distancing.” Then she said- “Just kidding” and we, well, you know. I love your feisty, playful, sexy loving ways Malia May Johnson! I knew I was the luckiest man alive when she told me this was her philosophy on…
To Malia May Johnson, Happy 8 Year Anniversary of the day we first “officially met”! Happy 4 Year Engagement Anniversary! Happy 3 Year Wedding Anniversary! Happy Monthaversary! I would be lost without you! I can’t live without you! I would die for you! All of my love, MJ P.S. I love you with every beat of my heart! The Center…
Oh no! My wife is possessed. I was going to call the Ghostbusters to come get her, but then she wanted to have sex with me, and since even though she was possessed and all, she is still my wife, and she was looking preggo sexy as hell! I decided to risk it. I love you baby, even when you…
Yesterday Malia and I were talking about some of our most fun dates, and she brought up the time we went to the house where they filmed the Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie in Granger, Texas, which is not to far from Austin. Due to my alleged involvement as the chief architect of the Stuxnet computer virus which had international consequences,…