Malia: Hey baby! How are you feeling? MJ: My headache went away. I felt better after I got up and got going. I do have this swelling going on in one part of my body though. See attached pic. Malia: I bought a little outfit to wear today that might help with your swelling problem. MJ: This is a major…
Malia: Baby, would you still love me if I looked like this…….. MJ: Yes, but I am glad you look like this……… Malia: Would you really love me if I looked like that? MJ: Yes. I don’t just love you for your looks, but your beauty doesn’t hurt either. Malia: That is the heaviest woman in the world. MJ: I…
This was Malia and I’s fun shower together this morning. Malia: Hey baby! Come on in. MJ: Hello my love. Note- I kissed Malia. Then I sat down in the back of the shower and just watched her take a shower while we talked. Malia: Are you just going to watch me get a shower? MJ: Yeah. Is that ok?…
MJ and I met on March 8th, 2012. MJ was going through a lot at the time. He was dealing with the fallout from being the alleged architect of Stuxnet, the world’s first cyber weapon that almost caused World War III. MJ was still married to his first wife. I refer to her as his practice wife, because MJ was…
Malia: Baby, remember this? It is always interesting to see what your brilliant, loving, and slightly perverted, but in a good way, mind will come up with. I know you hand wrote the Dear P@$$y letter back in the day, but your handwriting looks like ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics, no offense, so I typed it out to be able to post…
Alleged Crime: Exceeding The Maximum Sexiness Level MJ: I do believe that then and there Malia May Johnson committed the crime of exceeding the maximum sexiness level. Malia: Shouldn’t it be I do believe that here and now I committed the crime of exceeding the sexy level? MJ: On arrest warrants it says then and there, not here and now.…
You never know when or where you will meet someone that will change your life forever. Always be open to opportunities. Thank you for saying yes to going on a date with me eventually. Thank you for marrying me. Thank you for making me a father. 3-8-2012 forever baby! I love you Malia May Johnson!
“Baby, my temperature has to be at least like elevendy billion degrees. I feel like a nuclear friggin reactor or something. I’m pretty sure I could power a small city with all the heat my body is generating right now.” MJ was tested. It is not COVID, but his temperature got as high as 104. MJ’s mom flew up to…
Malia: Hey baby. I read your email. Sorry you are having a stressful day. I love you. I am available if you need some stress relief if you know what I mean. MJ: Thanks babe. I love you too. Malia: You are usually all about it bout it when I offer “stress relief”. I am a good listener. We can…
Malia: Mr. “MJ The Terrible”, why do you want to fight with your wife when we could be doing something a whole lot more fun together? We have a babysitter tonight! MJ: You started it! Malia: You started it! MJ: You started it!! Malia: You started it!!!!! MJ: You were relentless with your feistiness today. Malia: And clearly I need…