Malia: Uhm, excuse me Mr Johnson. Did you think I was done with you yet? Until there is a baby in my belly we’ve got work to do! Now bring your skinny white butt in here and get to work. MJ: Baby you are barely 5 foot 4 and probably don’t weigh 100 pounds soaking wet. How are you such…
Tag: Foreplay
All work and no sex doesn’t…..
MJ I love you to death, but all work and no sex doesn’t make a baby. The problem is your work sex balance is off. I got you a present to unwrap to fix that. It’s me! 👉 + 👌 = 👪 XOXOXOXO Now come unwrap me! Some of my favorite hot/sexy quotes from my best friend, lover, mother of…
Foreplay & Sex Can Come Out of Anywhere!
Malia: What are you singing down there baby? MJ: I didn’t know I was singing that loud. For some reason I can’t stop singing or putting out awesome content. I just feel in the zone right now. Malia: Baby, I can hear every word, and you are on a roll. You are turning me on with the sexy spins you’re…
Don’t Stick That Tongue Out At Me Mrs Johnson
MJ: Don’t stick that tongue out at me unless you are going to use it Johnson. Malia: I’m not afraid to use it. Point blank- You know where to find me. My bed is your bed. Monday morning at 10 am. Be there, or miss out on what my tongue can do. MJ: I love you dirty bird. Let’s do…
Pour Some Sugar On Me! (Damn It’s Incredible When You Find Mr or Mrs Right!)
When you find Mr or Mrs Right……Holy shit is it incredible! Texts between my wife and I- Malia: What time do you think you’ll be home baby? MJ: Depending on the traffic, in probably about an hour or so. I miss you. Malia: Do you mean you miss sex? MJ: I miss you overall, but yes, I miss sex too.…
Having Your Cake and Eating It Too, and Sex On Top of That
MJ: Did your mom come pick up the kids yet? Malia: Yes. I’m excited to go to the game. Hook’em Horns! MJ: Baby, my balls are the same color as the ocean. I want to skip the game and bang the shit out if you! Malia: Are you just saying that? I know how much you like the Longhorns. MJ:…
Trick or Treat Naughty Style
Trick or Treat Naughty Style: Malia: I was so embarrassed last night. I can’t believe Alexa sent Emma and I’s private convo to you. MJ: Baby! It’s all good. What is a “deep orgasm” anyway? Malia: It’s the good kind. Do you talk about our sex life with the guys? MJ: Sometimes. Malia: What do you say? MJ: Good things.…
Yes Girls Do Talk About Sex
Malia: Thank you Alexa for messing up my wife’s voice commands, and accidentally sending me this make me feel awesome message, that was intended for her friend Emma- “He is the first and only man I have been with that gives me deep orgasms. I have only been with 2 other men besides MJ. I enjoyed sex with them, but…
Malia & MJ The Terrible…..”Naughty Karate”
MJ: Question….What happened when I walked through the front door of our house today and my wife was waiting for me in a sexy as hell karate outfit, and says- “Are you ready for your naughty karate lesson “MJ The Terrible”? A. We immediately had awesome karate sex. B. Since I was already in a playful mood, I decided to…
The “5D” Movie Experience
This morning….. Malia: I wasn’t feeling very pretty today, but this cute boy on my left told me I was beautiful. Thank you for making my day baby! This afternoon….. There’s the “Mile High Club”, and other fun references for people that have had sex in certain places. I’m not sure if there is already a name for people who…