MJ: Malia May Sexy Booty Beauty Johnson, my dick is woke! Malia: Do you know what woke means baby? MJ: I think so. Let me try to use it in a sentence. Malia May Sexy Booty Beauty Johnson, my dick is woke! Malia: This is the definition of Woke- alert to injustice in society, especially racism. MJ: Exactly! Malia: How…
MJ: The Nookie Monster is hungry! Malia: Oh yeah? What do you want to eat Nookie Monster? MJ: I am going to eat you for lunch. Malia: Are you going to “doink me” like your Dad calls sex? Malia: What are you interested in my horny hubby? I think it’s so funny he calls sex “doinking”. MJ: I am interested…
Malia: I just talked to Dr. Frincke. She told me your test results on all of the testing you did. She said your test results surprised her. MJ: Bad? I haven’t been following the diet should told me to follow. Malia: Yeah, she noticed that. Your cholesterol was high. She asked me to help with your diet because she said…
Vaginasphere and Supersizing Sex MJ: Are you busy babe? Malia: I just got off a video chat with my girls. MJ: How is the vaginasphere? Malia: A lot of drama. Apparently it’s hard to find a good man these days. MJ: I try. Malia: You are awesome baby! I don’t want to let another woman close enough to you to…
May is military appreciation month, and you are an American hero Michael David Johnson. I really want to service you. I mean I really want to thank you for your service. You know that song “America, Fuck Yeah! Comin’ Again To Save The Mother Day” song from the Team America World Police movie? I know you do. I rewrote the…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “I am so glad my thick thighs make your penis rise.” Malia May Johnson “Oh my god! I love when you move my hair and start kissing on my neck and rubbing your c@$k against…
Malia: Baby, do you know what sexual fetish you have? MJ: Maliaphobia? Malia: That would mean you have a sexual phobia about me. As in, you don’t want to have sex with me. MJ: Hornyformaliaalwaysophilia Malia: I like that one. If you put phila at the end of something it means you are all about it bout it. If you…
The Naughty Alphabet Motivated by my Sexy Bride Malia A is for Ass B is for Butt C is for Cumming D is for Dirty E is for Ecstasy F is for Fucking G is for Groaning H is for Horny I is for Intimate J is for Juggs K is for Kissing L is for Licking M is for…
You May Now Make Love To The Bride! MJ: Please don’t. MJ: Please don’t. MJ: Please don’t. MJ: Please don’t. Malia: Please don’t what? MJ: I can hear you singing the song by Adele “Never mind I’ll Find Someone Like You”. Malia: Aww! Are you feeling needy? MJ: More like wanty. Malia: This is what I can offer you. Sex…
Here is what happened when I walked into one of the spare bedrooms Malia is redoing, and I found her lying naked on the bed covered up by 3 giant stuffed animals, also known as “The Stuffed Animal Bandits”. MJ: Oh no! Andre The Giant Bear, Shamu, and Bad News Brown Dog are trying to kidnap Malia! Malia: Help me!…