Hey MJ! Mike Westbrooks from Toronto. You ever wear a chastity lock on your wang to spice things up with Malia? MJ: Thanks for the question Mike, but why would I wear a chastity lock on my wang? How could we have sex? Mike Westbrooks: You know. Like so you couldn’t have sex. It is frustrating and it makes you…
Tag: Sex
The Johnson Family Baby Factory
MJ: Malia, thank you for making me feel so loved that I actually have trouble processing the hate Gotye constantly throws at me. If/when(unfortunately) Gotye blows this opportunity to be a good coparent, I know we will raise CJ the right way, in the completely supportive and loving environment he deserves Malia: As far as I’m concerned, we have 4…
Then come rock it!
MJ: Excuse me Maam, but you have one rockin hot body for a pregnant chick. Malia: Then come rock it! MJ: Mrs. Johnson, by the time you get done listening to this song, I will be doing exactly as you have requested- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SdIVPs8gZ8
Malia Talks With A Sexologist
Question: My question is for Malia. I am a sexologist. I can’t see you but I bet you laughed like everyone else does when I tell them what my profession is. I am currently studying the smell of men’s “goo”, if you will. I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind sharing what MJ THE TERRIBLE’s you know, stuff smells like?…
“I’ll Take You To The Candy Shop”
Malia: Hi “MJ The Terrible”. I am your biggest fan, and I have a request. Will you please come over to my apartment and make sweet sweet lovin to me, until we fall asleep in each others arms? MJ: I’m sorry maam, but I would never cheat on my wife. Not happenin! Malia: Can’t I at least tell you what…
Body Consent?
Malia: We had sex last night when you were unconscious. MJ: Was I any good? Malia: Good enough. MJ: Cool. Malia: You consented. MJ: How could I if I was unconscious? Malia: Your body said you were ready. MJ: My body consented? You should be a lawyer babe. Malia: Your mind didn’t need to consent, because your body did. MJ:…
“50 Shades of Terrible”…..right meow please
Malia: Take the “Mother fucking” hint MJ- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXACZdYN18Y Malia: “50 Shades of Terrible”…..right meow please MJ: Perfect timing! He just left. Malia: I just watched the movie. I’m in the mood. MJ: 50 Shades Preggo edition…..coming right up! Do you want to be James Bond and get the girl or what? – https://www.therealmjtheterrible.com/do-you-want-to-be-james-bond-and-get-the-girl-or-what/
Hand Signal Emoticons For Sex
MJ: How can I be the reason you smile today baby? Malia: Stop working insane hours, and actually sleep next to me the whole night. MJ: That sounds great. I’ll be up in 2. Malia: You make me smile a lot. MJ: I love to see you smile. Your beautiful smile has taken my breath away for more than 5…
The Queen Wishes To Be Jousted This Morning
Malia: Where is thine knight this sunrise? MJ: Dust though queen wish for thine knight to return to kiss his queens beautiful lips? Malia: No she does not. The queen wishes to be jousted this morning. MJ: Again my queen? I thought thine queen received quite the thrashing last evening. Malia: Thine queen wanted love making last evening but got…