Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “Look at that. There is an indent in the bed from your butt. Your butt can do anything. Your butt is incredible.” Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson “I have nothing but benevolent intentions for pleasing…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “We bond. We love bond. We pleasure bond. We trauma bond. We treasury bond. We even watch James Bond. We are bonded, and that is a good thing.” Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson “Is that…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “Stop kissing and touching? I fucking object! Life is too short to stop this perfect moment in time until we have to.” Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson “Bone app a tittie.” Michael “MJ The Terrible”…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “Be careful sweetheart. If you start something, be ready to finish it.” Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson “I took one of Gay Dave’s companies boner pills. I figure I am either going to die while…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “I am going to have a stress induced panic attack unless I unload this stress into your vagina.” Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson “Does not compute. Does not compute. Slide to the side. Slide to…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “I love you for all of the good honest reasons, but I also love you for all the naughty dirty reasons.” Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson “I will forever remember today as three quickies day.…
Malia: I read an article that talked about how women look like their daddies with a wig on. Then I took your business profile picture and used a see what a man would like as a woman app. This is what you would look like as a woman and what our girls could grow up to look like…… MJ: I…
Malia: I did good baby! Real good! MJ: Good. What did you do? Malia: I married a top 1% man. MJ: I try. I love you more than words can express. Malia: And you are the Six Sixes. It’s like a dream guy stats situation. Malia: The Six Sixes1. A six-figure salary2. At least six feet tall3. At least 600…
MJ: Quickies are the exception to every rule about delayed gratification, putting in the time to achieve what you, etc. Malia: Well, yeah, sort of. MJ: I can see the wheels turning in your head even though I can’t physically see you right now. Philosophize me babe. Malia: Guys get quickies (instant gratification), because they put in the time to…
Malia: I love your Cheetos post. Great memories! This is my favorite Cheetos picture of us. Thinking about our Cheetos moments makes me want to have more Cheetos moments. MJ: Agreed Malia: Are you in the mood for some postnatal coitus? MJ: Huh? Malia: Sex baby! Sex! Postnatal coitus is a fancy medical term for having sex after giving birth.…