MJ: I hear what you are saying but I think I need to feel what you are saying to really understand it. Malia: You need to feel a grocery list? MJ: Groceries are life. Groceries are sustenance. Malia: You are really taking groceries seriously. MJ: It’s life or death. Malia: White or wheat toast bread is life or death?…
Tag: Malia's Deadly Butt Weapon
“Stuff”
Malia: Do you think the saying “Black Lives Matter” is racist? MJ: No. The saying is meant to call attention to an important issue. The saying isn’t “Only Black Lives Matter”. Malia: I agree. They are debating it right now on the show I’m watching. I love you my enlightened, sexy, woke, big heart, big brain, big dick husband! MJ:…
Vaginasphere and Supersizing Sex
Vaginasphere and Supersizing Sex MJ: Are you busy babe? Malia: I just got off a video chat with my girls. MJ: How is the vaginasphere? Malia: A lot of drama. Apparently it’s hard to find a good man these days. MJ: I try. Malia: You are awesome baby! I don’t want to let another woman close enough to you to…
Sexy Self Defense
Malia: Michael David Johnson! I am trying to poop in peace! I don’t need you to sing to me while I am pooping! MJ: I am just trying to help. Malia: How does you singing “Ah! Push it! Push it real good!”, help me to poop any better than when I poop in silence? MJ: It’s poop encouragement, and we…
Malia’s Deadly Butt Weapon
MJ: You should have to register your butt as a deadly weapon. Malia: Ok. I will indulge you baby. Why should I have to register my butt as a deadly weapon? MJ: Because it is dangerous! Malia: How so? MJ: When your little niece came running around the corner, you spun your butt around, she ran into it, and the…