MJ: Question….What happened when I walked through the front door of our house today and my wife was waiting for me in a sexy as hell karate outfit, and says- “Are you ready for your naughty karate lesson “MJ The Terrible”? A. We immediately had awesome karate sex. B. Since I was already in a playful mood, I decided to…
Malia: Save a horse. Ride an MJ? MJ: I gotta be out the door in 10 minutes. Malia: Perfect! MJ: Is this “strategic sex” as you call it? Because you want your smell and stuff on me because I will see my ex tonight? Malia: Its weird because I’m not jealous of her, and I know you would never cheat…
MJ: Are you ready for baby making practice today? Malia: Not yet. MJ: You mean to tell me that Mrs Always Wants A Baby, we need to be trying constantly, is not ready? I don’t believe it! Did hell freeze over or something? Malia: I am buying you a present. MJ: Aww. Baby. You don’t have to buy me anything.…
Malia: Baby, I love you. I am so sorry I have been a total bitch to you all day. You didn’t deserve it. The reason I got mad was stupid. You didn’t do anything wrong. I love you baby so much! Will you please forgive me? MJ: It’s fine babe. Let’s just drop it. Malia: No! I won’t just drop…
MJ: Dubs, please don’t send me anymore emails. “THE ONE AND ONLY DUBS”? Good Lord! Dubs: Hi. My name is Dubs. My daily job is to protect “MJ The Terrible” and his family. I enjoy protecting his family. “MJ The Terrible”, the world’s most followed computer hacker, not so much! Malia: MJ and Dubs fight like brother and sister but…
Malia: Who do you think you are just kissing me like that? MJ: The luckiest man in the world. Malia: I hate you. MJ: Why? Malia: Because I’m a girl, and sometimes we want to get mad at our man for no reason at all while we are emotional. MJ: Are you mad at me? Malia: I want to be,…
Malia: Baby, do you remember when we took this picture? MJ: 1955? Malia: Hey! I like black and white pictures. MJ: I’m just teasing baby. Dr. Pepper factory in Waco? I remember what kind of under boonies you had on that day. Malia: Under boonies? What kind? MJ: I’m in kid communication mode right now, so I threw the kid…
Whether you are celebrating Valentine’s Day with the one you love, your friends, your family, or will be enjoying some “me time” today, Malia and I would like to wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day! From the time Malia and I started to show an interest in each other, there were some who didn’t think it would work, who didn’t…
Kevin: What are you going to buy with your $250,000 check from Amazon? MJ: $62,500 a day for 4 days and you don’t have to do anything but post their shit…….HELL YEAH!! MJ: With part of the money I want to take my son to Disney World, and I’d like to help the Wounded Warrior Project some. Malia: My guess…
Malia: This is why I love my husband. Principal over profits, which will probably lead to more profits, because of his principles. That was a tongue twister, but read this. It will make sense. Note: All of MJ’s calls are recorded due to the legal craziness of his life. This is a call transcription from earlier today. “Is this “MJ…