Baby, I love your big smile, your big heart, and your big butt! Thank you for handling my “old baggage” for me, so that I can take care of business. There isn’t anything that I wouldn’t do for you. I thought after I got divorced from my first wife, or as you like to call her, my “practice wife”, that…
Baby, Thank you for an incredible day at the beach! Here’s what Malia said about the video- “Aww! I love the video, but of course the wind blocks the part at the beginning where you say that I was right about buying the beach house. I know you really meant what you said in the video, because you broke character…
MJ: Question….What happened when I walked through the front door of our house today and my wife was waiting for me in a sexy as hell karate outfit, and says- “Are you ready for your naughty karate lesson “MJ The Terrible”? A. We immediately had awesome karate sex. B. Since I was already in a playful mood, I decided to…
Malia: Save a horse. Ride an MJ? MJ: I gotta be out the door in 10 minutes. Malia: Perfect! MJ: Is this “strategic sex” as you call it? Because you want your smell and stuff on me because I will see my ex tonight? Malia: Its weird because I’m not jealous of her, and I know you would never cheat…
MJ: Are you ready for baby making practice today? Malia: Not yet. MJ: You mean to tell me that Mrs Always Wants A Baby, we need to be trying constantly, is not ready? I don’t believe it! Did hell freeze over or something? Malia: I am buying you a present. MJ: Aww. Baby. You don’t have to buy me anything.…
Malia: Baby, I love you. I am so sorry I have been a total bitch to you all day. You didn’t deserve it. The reason I got mad was stupid. You didn’t do anything wrong. I love you baby so much! Will you please forgive me? MJ: It’s fine babe. Let’s just drop it. Malia: No! I won’t just drop…
MJ: Dubs, please don’t send me anymore emails. “THE ONE AND ONLY DUBS”? Good Lord! Dubs: Hi. My name is Dubs. My daily job is to protect “MJ The Terrible” and his family. I enjoy protecting his family. “MJ The Terrible”, the world’s most followed computer hacker, not so much! Malia: MJ and Dubs fight like brother and sister but…
Malia: Who do you think you are just kissing me like that? MJ: The luckiest man in the world. Malia: I hate you. MJ: Why? Malia: Because I’m a girl, and sometimes we want to get mad at our man for no reason at all while we are emotional. MJ: Are you mad at me? Malia: I want to be,…
Malia: Baby, do you remember when we took this picture? MJ: 1955? Malia: Hey! I like black and white pictures. MJ: I’m just teasing baby. Dr. Pepper factory in Waco? I remember what kind of under boonies you had on that day. Malia: Under boonies? What kind? MJ: I’m in kid communication mode right now, so I threw the kid…
Whether you are celebrating Valentine’s Day with the one you love, your friends, your family, or will be enjoying some “me time” today, Malia and I would like to wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day! From the time Malia and I started to show an interest in each other, there were some who didn’t think it would work, who didn’t…