MJ: Baby, did you mess with my phone? All of my texts with Gotye are gone, and she is no longer in my contacts. I tried to enter her # so I can check on you know who, but my phone is not letting me do it. Dubs: I did it. You will be able to resume communication with Gotye…
Tag: Malia and MJ
MJ Drunk Love For Malia
MJ: Baby I am drunk but I wan yoy to knlw I carry these thibgs around with me all the timer because I didn’t know the worst tine of my life wpuld turn out tp ne the best. Itd because of you Malia. I love yoy. Im sorry I smell lick alcohol and dont wsnt to kiss me tonight. I…
“Husbandly duties”
Malia: MJ, even Superman has to rest. You slept at least 16 hours. You needed it! Malia: I did good things. Now I’m ready to do bad things to you. Men expect their wives to perform “wifely duties”, meaning sex, just because the man wants it. This is 2017. Women should be able to do the same thing. I am…
Content For “The Adventures of MJ The Terrible” Movie
Question: MJ, it is Jeff at GL again. We would like to use the attached email you sent to Malia at the end of 2014 in the film. Is that ok with you? – Beginning of email – Malia, I was trying to just lay there dormant in the grass, soaking up some sunshine but people keep trying to step…
Vivid International Studios Offer To Purchase The Rights To Make a Pornographic Movie Based On The World Famous “Mother Fucker” Sex Experience
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Johnson, My name is Shawn Higgins, and I represent Vivid International Studios. My clients are interested in producing an adult film based on an encounter yourself and Mrs. Johnson wrote about on the internet. The “Mother Fucker” post has approximately 4,000 likes, has been clicked on 51,000,000 times, and is in Facebook’s top 25,000 most clicked…
Call me at 1-800-undateable for additional details….if you dare
All of us girls are at the apartment downtown. MJ and the boys are at MJ’s house in South Austin. This is BABB btw. Those boys won’t leave us alone. There was a knock at the door. It was a male stripper wearing a costume. When the stripper pulled off his mask, IT WAS KEVIN! For some reason we asked…
MJ Kevin and Malia-da-belly
I can hear you 2 shitheads! If I even smell a hint of beer in Elizabeth’s room, or you spill something, I’m pregnant with “MJ The Terrible’s” twins, so I’m pretty sure I’m allowed to claim temporary insanity for killing you both. MJ’s buddy Kevin is here for the wedding, so let the bromance begin. Kevin and MJ have already…
We’re Having Twins!
We just left the emergency room follow up appointment with Malia and the baby’s doctor. It turns out we are not having twin girls. The ultra sound showed two babies in their, but one is a girl and one is a boy! We decided to name the girl Elizabeth Grace Johnson, and the boy Cash Michael Johnson Elizabeth and Grace…
I’m Having These Twins
I am such a happy fiancée and daddy right now! Malia and the twins are healthy! We just got home from the hospital and Malia fell asleep. Malia, you are tough as nails. The Doctor was trying to be comforting to Malia, in the event that there were complications with the twins, but my baby I am proud to say,…
MJ The Gigolo Johnson At Your Service My Love
Malia: Well look at you “Martin Luther The Terrible”. Do you have a digital dream baby? I love you MJ. Thanks for always having my back. I’m adding up how much money you do have after you gave most of it away. If you are poor now, you can live with me for free, but I’m taxing natures credit card…