My Favorite Recent Quotes From People That I Know Malia May Johnson Edition by Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson: “It is a beautiful thing when two become one, like you and me. It is even more of a beautiful thing when the two become one, and make more twos and ones, meaning babies, like you and me again. Please don’t…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “I love how you randomly break out into song and dance like life is a musical and you always find a way to run into me for a hold, hug, kiss. That shit is adorable.”…
Malia: Liz could be getting married soon. MJ: Liz just turned 7. Malia: I am teasing obviously. I text you that because I saw a post on X that Iraq’s Parliament introduced a bill to reduce the legal age of marriage for girls from 15 to 9 years old. MJ: Crazy! Malia: Don’t ever hug me okay? MJ: Don’t ever…
Malia: Alright baby, it’s that time of the month again. MJ: That’s okay baby. It’s all good. I hope aunt flow isn’t too rough this month. Malia: Not that time of the month. It’s time for a relationship quiz. MJ: I love you. I would never cheat on you. You look beautiful and skinny. You’re an awesome wife and a…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “Are your legs open? I’m fixin to run in there and dick dive into you.” Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson “I am in a giving mood. Are you in a taking mood?” Michael “MJ The…
Malia: Hey baby! Tell me something I don’t know. MJ: August is the only month without a Federal holiday. Malia: I didn’t know that. MJ: You know what I want? Malia: A peanut butter and jelly sandwich? MJ: I want you! Malia: To make you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich? Malia: You didn’t text back. Do you want me…
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Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “Babe, I have to say, you take honey potting to the next level. I am a lucky mofo.” Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson “I have noticed how you have been feeding me foods filled with…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “Look at that. There is an indent in the bed from your butt. Your butt can do anything. Your butt is incredible.” Michael “MJ The Terrible” Johnson “I have nothing but benevolent intentions for pleasing…
Malia: You are not meeting my standards Michael David Johnson! MJ: …… Malia: I have a demand and you are going to meet my demand or else! MJ: Babe, you have been ride or die. I am only alive and made it out of the hospital because of you. Whatever you want, go buy it! I mean it! Malia: How…