Malia: I haven’t heard from you yet today. Are we having afternoon mommy daddy playtime? Is mommy getting some? Mommy needs some! Malia: Sex relieves stress. Malia: Sex improves mood. Malia: Sex is fun. Malia: Sex increases energy. Malia: Sex fuels creativity. Malia: Sex improves relationships. Malia: Sex is powerful. We should have some today dontcha think? MJ: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-Rqdgna3Yw&list=WL&index=7 Malia: Michael…
Malia: I have 4 questions for you Mr. Johnson! MJ: Okay. Tee it high and let it fly. Malia: Question #1. If this Bigfoot Yeti monster attacked our family would you protect us….. MJ: He looks pretty angry. Run fast! Malia: What do you mean run fast? MJ: What I mean is he would probably do me in pretty quick…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “As you can see, my hair is up in a bun. So, you know I mean business.” Malia May Johnson “I know baby. When you aren’t getting any, it shows. You are way feistier. I…
MJ: What are you up to my love? Malia: I’m looking for a job. MJ: No Malia: Are you telling me no? MJ: No, but can we talk about it first? I always support you, but right now with trying to get pregnant, and with being a stay at home mom of 7, and with all that you already do,…
Malia: So, you don’t want to have sex with me and make a baby that will grow up to worship you and ignore me like the rest of our children do? MJ: Everything but the last part. Our babies love you. You are an awesome mom! I have to work. While I am working they miss me, so when I…
All of the symptoms were there on Tuesday night that you were going to have a migraine on Wednesday (Bedroom Quarantine Day), but you did not have one. Instead, you took me to new heights of pleasure and satisfaction…..WOW!!! You showed up to “Bedroom Quarantine Day” ready to throw down. Before you started pleasing my body, you had me sopping…
Warning: If you are not 18 years of age or older, do not read this post, because these quotes are definitely meant for adults only! “I am going to be wrapping my legs around you a lot very very soon. Bedroom Quarantine Day is October 20th!” Malia May Johnson “I made a strip club songs playlist to baby making practice…
MJ: I married Lisa Marie Malia: WTF? Who is Lisa Marie??? MJ: I hit send accidentally before I was done typing. MJ: I was going text….. I married Lisa Marie Presley’s twin, Malia May Presley. You look like Elvis Presley’s daughter. I was only being playful. I love you and you are always on my mind baby cakes. Malia: Gotcha.…
MJ: Malia May Sexy Booty Beauty Johnson, my dick is woke! Malia: Do you know what woke means baby? MJ: I think so. Let me try to use it in a sentence. Malia May Sexy Booty Beauty Johnson, my dick is woke! Malia: This is the definition of Woke- alert to injustice in society, especially racism. MJ: Exactly! Malia: How…
May is military appreciation month, and you are an American hero Michael David Johnson. I really want to service you. I mean I really want to thank you for your service. You know that song “America, Fuck Yeah! Comin’ Again To Save The Mother Day” song from the Team America World Police movie? I know you do. I rewrote the…